Husband does not invest in me. I do not feel important. Should I move on?
I am 33 yr woman married to a 38 yr man, married for 3 yrs now. We both are Indian live in the US. I met my husband 6 yrs back in south America we the
I am 33 yr woman married to a 38 yr man, married for 3 yrs now. We both are Indian live in the US. I met my husband 6 yrs back in south America we then decided to get married 3 yrs back after 3 yrs of long distance relationship. I was always deeply in love with my husband. Initially my husband don’t wanted to get married on which I was ready to leave him because I dnt wanted to be in uncommitted relationship. So, by husband agreed to get married to me.
After the marriage, I never felt that my husband is investing enough in the relationship. He does things for me and he is very polite and nice but I do not feel the close bonding with him. Initially, I thought everything will be better with time but nothing has changed and now I have started to rebel little bit which my husband does not like at all. If I am 10 points angry about something then he will be 100 points angry on that. He does not have patience to work with me when I am not happy. Additionally, he is a very nice Indian only son and super protective about his parents. He do not like me questioning anything about them too. By the way, we pay all their expenses in India and they control all the money my husband has saved (which is quite a lot).
Lastly, he continues to use disrespectful words for me whenever he is angry. He blames me for everything bad happening in his life. For example, he blames that I wasted his life because I made him move to the US etc. He just liked to me taken care and don’t want to get to any sensitive deeper topics.
I love him very much. I know he is a very nice person. However, I am not sure on why he doesn’t want to invest in this relationship. I know everything will be fine the moment he is ready to have a conversation with me. Lately, I have started to see lot of anger in his voice too. What should I do? Pls help. ☹
or:I am 33 yr woman married to a 38 yr man, married for 3 yrs now. We both are Indian live in the US. I met my husband 6 yrs back in south America we then decided to get married 3 yrs back after 3 yrs of long distance relationship. I was always deeply in love with my husband. Initially my husband don\u2019t wanted to get married on which I was ready to leave him because I dnt wanted to be in uncommitted relationship. So, by husband agreed to get married to me. After the marriage, I never felt that my husband is investing enough in the relationship. He does things for me and he is very polite and nice but I do not feel the close bonding with him. Initially, I thought everything will be better with time but nothing has changed and now I have started to rebel little bit which my husband does not like at all. If I am 10 points angry about something then he will be 100 points angry on that. He does not have patience to work with me when I am not happy. Additionally, he is a very nice Indian only son and super protective about his parents. He do not like me questioning anything about them too. By the way, we pay all their expenses in India and they control all the money my husband has saved (which is quite a lot). Lastly, he continues to use disrespectful words for me whenever he is angry. He blames me for everything bad happening in his life. For example, he blames that I wasted his life because I made him move to the US etc. He just liked to me taken care and don\u2019t want to get to any sensitive deeper topics. I love him very much. I know he is a very nice person. However, I am not sure on why he doesn\u2019t want to invest in this relationship. I know everything will be fine the moment he is ready to have a conversation with me. Lately, I have started to see lot of anger in his voice too. What should I do? Pls help. \u2639
or:You think he isn't invested?!He didn't want to get married but he married you anyway.He is exceptionally close to his parents and you got him to leave his home country and them behind to move to the U.S. Lady, I'd call that invested!It sounds as if you love him when he does what you want in the way you want. It also sounds as if he is finally arriving at the conclusion he made the wrong choice in getting married. I'd recommend marriage counseling and when/if that doesn't work a divorce lawyer.
or:I think it is important to have patience and to recognise that we will never have everything perfect. He probably also sees things in you which he wishes were different. Compromise and communiction is vital. Try to be the wife you think he wants you to be, then work on making him the husband you want him to be, all the while knowing that nothing will be like it is in the films...
