Need help mending relationships?
I had a realization at work today (details of how it came about are irrelevant.) I realized that I really have spent the majority of my life being a n
I had a realization at work today (details of how it came about are irrelevant.) I realized that I really have spent the majority of my life being a narcissist. I also realized that while I have definitely made strides, I still do it sometimes, often without realizing it. I see that narcissism is part of my personality, and i hate it. I can't change what I did, and I definiently don't want to belittle what I've done by saying "I'm sorry." However, I really do want to make those that I've hurt to know what I did was wrong, and that the words remorse and regret don't begin to describe how I feel for my actions. I want to salvage relationships with those that I've hurt, but more than that, I want healing for them, because ironically the narcissist in me tells me that if I can somehow fix it, then maybe I'll be able to forgive myself. I know that God gives is all grace, but part of me can't help but feel that after what I did, I really don't deserve to move on and have healthy relationships when I took just that from other people.
Can anyone give me any tips on this? How can I approach people that I've hurt, even if I should?
or:I had a realization at work today (details of how it came about are irrelevant.) I realized that I really have spent the majority of my life being a narcissist. I also realized that while I have definitely made strides, I still do it sometimes, often without realizing it. I see that narcissism is part of my personality, and i hate it. I can't change what I did, and I definiently don't want to belittle what I've done by saying \"I'm sorry.\" However, I really do want to make those that I've hurt to know what I did was wrong, and that the words remorse and regret don't begin to describe how I feel for my actions. I want to salvage relationships with those that I've hurt, but more than that, I want healing for them, because ironically the narcissist in me tells me that if I can somehow fix it, then maybe I'll be able to forgive myself. I know that God gives is all grace, but part of me can't help but feel that after what I did, I really don't deserve to move on and have healthy relationships when I took just that from other people. Can anyone give me any tips on this? How can I approach people that I've hurt, even if I should?
or:Be direct and honest. Maybe you don't talk to them in person, but send them emails or texts telling them you're really sorry.
or:Don't. They won't know how to respond to you, so just make a new life with new people.Take acting classes to help make the transition. In acting, the rule is \"Fake it till you make it!\"
or:If they blame you for their life going awry, your apology won't count for aught. This isn't hollywood, nobody just gets closure in 5 seconds because the mind won't let go of its concept of reality like that.If they don't remember what you did, or stopped caring, you're more likely to be dredging up old wounds.These reveries are deceitful - you think it's to help them but the concealed intention is to ease your conscience. You wish to improve, then learn how (as you go), and take the path of least resistance in that direction. May or may not include another chance to reconnect, but don't impose. Assist people because they need it, not because you feel obliged.
